Reflecting on a Miscarriage, One Family’s Story

On the 9th month of our journey to conceive, with two women aged 40, we were blessed to see that second line one morning in July. The timing was absolutely perfect. I would be 12 weeks pregnant on our wedding day, and we would announce to our families on our joyous day. My 6 year old son, from a previous marriage, was over the moon. He said he had been waiting his whole life to be a big brother. 

Finally, the stars aligned for our little family. Then less than two weeks later, it was all torn away. I noticed a tiny spot of blood and in my heart, I knew. I did not anticipate the devastation that followed. It wasn’t just losing a brand new pregnancy; it was losing the entire life of the child to be, that I had already envisioned. All the plans we had made in our minds and in our hearts, they were gone too. Some days, I feel like I’ll never be as happy as I was before that moment. I heal some each day, but it changed me. This experience will always stay with me. I well up with tears once in awhile, for no reason, except a flash of what might have been. 

We continue our journey to grow our family and we strongly believe that everything happens for a reason. Reasons we aren’t meant to understand. I have been lucky enough to experience the joy of pregnancy and motherhood once in this life. I believe I meant to do so again. So, onward. It’s worth it in the end ❤️.

- A, S, and AJ